Why we had three tubes of toothpaste in our hotel room

Here’s why we had three tubes of toothpaste in our hotel room when we stayed in London. I think you’ll agree that’s more toothpaste than anyone needs for a weekend away. 

Bottle of bubble bath shaped like a boy - dressed in a blue and white sailor outfit

A tale of what happens when you don’t ask for what you actually want.

Well, it happened because I’m so very British.

Y’see, in our (beautiful) hotel room we didn’t have a shower; we had one of those giant clawfoot baths that you can practically swim around in… but although the hotel gives you the usual toiletries, there was no actual bubble bath. So on the way back from Mile End parkrun (we changed our minds and decided Hampstead Heath was too far away) I decided to get some bubble bath.

“Matey bubbles” as Joe kept calling them.

(As an aside, did you know Matey bubbles are a thing? Apparently you get bubble bath in a bottle shaped like a sailor, and you twist his head off to access the bubbles. Sounds barbaric to me.)

So just up the road from our hotel, there was a corner shop. I didn’t want to ask for bubble bath (dunno why now, I think it was a combination of mud-spattered legs and embarrassment) – so I went in and asked if they sold toothpaste instead.

My reasoning was thus: if they sell toothpaste, they probably sell other toiletries and therefore Matey bubbles. It was a solid plan. Sound. Absolutely no way I could look like a dick.

Except they didn’t sell Matey bubbles. Or any other type of bubbles. They did, however, sell toothpaste. Which I didn’t need. Or want.

Of course, I had to buy the toothpaste or I would have had to come clean about my Matey bubbles plan and that way lay public humiliation, shame, and finger-pointing.

Which is why we then had three tubes of toothpaste in our hotel bathroom. At least we have plenty at home now, we won’t run out any time soon…

Which doesn’t in any way lead me onto my book, Business for Superheroes but buy it, have a read; it’s got some great stuff on how to tell sticky stories.



Vicky Fraser is a copywriter, author, and entrepreneur. She really did run away with the circus… but when she’s not swinging from a trapeze, she’s showing other copywriters and small business owners how to work with better clients, make more money, and stop missing bathtimes, first words, and dinners with angry partners. In fact, she wrote the book on it. Get your copy here.

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