Suckling from the disappointing guru nipple

It winked at me with its weird little nipple, and I bent the spoon.

Not in a Uri Geller fake-magic shyster con-man kinda way, you understand. I bent the spoon on a disappointingly unripe avocado. 

Photo of an avocado

Shiny products sold by gurus are like unripe avocados – horribly disappointing. Invest time in following my 49 Ideas instead.

I love avocados.

Mostly I love them in their guacamole form, but I’ll happily sit and scoop out the radioactive-green flesh with a spoon, and jam it into my face. As a healthy snack.

This avocado, though…

It tempted me with its firm, yet yielding flesh. Perfectly dark green, winking at me with its weird little nipple, it looked perfect.

But it wasn’t. On the inside, it was disappointing.


Unsatisfying and unhelpful.

Just like those shiny shiny courses with their LAST CHANCE TO BUY!!!!!1!!111! fake scarcity offers screeching at you in your emails.

This disappointing avocado reminded me of those heady days in my business when I’d be seduced by the firm, yet yielding flesh of a tempting “guru” offer.

Sucked in by the winking nipple of the latest internet marketing phenomenon.

Teased into buying by the promise of an easy fix to the small business feast-and-famine rollercoaster.

All shiny-eyed, I’d fork over my credit card details and download the magic bullet…

…only to be sorely disappointed — again — when it turned out to be, well, not so great.

I’ll let you into a little secret, too: the last time it happened, it wasn’t so long ago. I’m relatively new to podcasting — or I was a few months ago — and so I bought a shiny “how to make loadsa cash from podcasting” thing.

The guy seemed legit. He is legit, I guess.

But the product? A whole lot of surface fluff I already knew or could find out easily, for quite a large pile of cash.

Very little in the way of meat and three veg and a generous helping of cheese.

Perhaps my standards are too high?

I don’t think so.

I hope not.

Anyway — my point is this. Perhaps you’ve been sucked in by the winking nipple of the latest internet marketing phenomenon. Perhaps you’re having a hard time trusting marketing experts.

Maybe you’ve decided you’re only going for free or cheap.

I get it.

But here’s the thing: once you find the right thing for you to invest in, everything changes. It did for me.

And it can for you.

Maybe my daily emails is the place for you to start.

Lots of great content that will gently prod your prospects into paying you more money, more often, more happily — and will build long term, profitable relationships at the same time.

Sign up here:



Vicky Fraser is a copywriter, author, and entrepreneur. She really did run away with the circus… but when she’s not swinging from a trapeze, she’s showing other copywriters and small business owners how to work with better clients, make more money, and stop missing bathtimes, first words, and dinners with angry partners. In fact, she wrote the book on it. Get your copy here.

0 comments… add one

Leave a Comment